Sometimes, I don’t even feel like it happened. Other times, its so real and I’m so raw I don’t know where to turn. I feel insane. I don’t cry all the time like my mom because I’m still shocked. And then I feel like a bad person. I just feel very confused and disoriented most of the time. My brain isn’t processing things normally…
I’m angry at myself for not acting like a normal person grieving. And it’s confusing my brain. I know it sounds ridiculous but idk how else to say it. I just feel like I’m in a emotional coma.
And I miss my sister a lot. I hear her voice over and over again. Saying my name. And then I hear her little kid voice in my head and it makes me sadder.
And the world keeps spinning.